
'I'm smiling but I'm dying trying not to drag my feet'
Yesterday I was going through some old journals and I came across this brief account I had written some years ago. I just thought I'd share...
"I’m starting to love driving to the beach at night and staying there for some 2 hours, on my own. I’m starting to enjoy staying there for hours again and it scares the shit out of me. I’m anxious again but once here everything feels perfect. I finish my can of beer, lust over the waves and feel whole again. I’m no longer scared, I’m no longer insecure – I have it perfectly planned out for me – tonight I’ll just go back home and first thing tomorrow I will go and do what needs to be done.